When I first moved to Johannesburg I was unsure about my future, but I took the journey to the City of Gold with half my belongings and stayed with a family friend. I was obviously not going to stay there forever so I started looking for a place of my own.
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A friend of mine had also moved up from Durban a year before and had her own place. She offered that I stay with her until I found my own place.
It sounded like such a good idea. Despite the numerous people who tried to tell me it would turn out bad, I didn't listen. "Our situation is different,” I would say. "We're very good at communicating,” I preached.

But she’s my friend so that’s cool

A month became two and two became a year. At first it was cool; we would reminisce about varsity and life was relaxed. But the moment I started getting paid I realised that things were not as rosy as they seemed on the surface; in fact I realised that I couldn’t live with her, but the question was where to go and how. We were friends; I wasn’t getting paid much so I had to stick out for a year until I saved enough and had a bed at least.

Things turn sour

My friend/flatmate and I were just not in the same headspace. We fought about the hot water; dishes left overnight; even me borrowing her shoes to go out. These never used to be issues before, but hey…

A lesson learnt

What I learnt during that time is that even if you are friends, it is not advisable to move in together unless you have reached a certain level of maturity. With moving in, you are in each other’s spaces and you are bound to get on each other’s nerves.  If I had known better I would have bunked with family friends and saved the friendship with my flatmate, but I suppose I had to go through that to know what I know now.

So how do you make the most of bunking with friends? Here’s my checklist:

• Choose who you move in with carefully: Do your personalities match? Do you share similar views on politics, fashion and religion?

• Is your roommate in a relationship or single? Yes it may be a lame question but it’s important to know if you will be spending your time with him/her or with a couple.

• Before you move in, draw up a set of house rules. These include guidelines about noise, taking out the bin and respecting each other’s spaces.

• Communicate: Don’t assume that your roommate is fine with you borrowing her stuff or using her creams.

• Draw up a cleaning and cooking roster: If you decide to share food, then draw up a roster of who cooks and cleans when. For example, if I cook, you wash the dishes and vice versa.

• Respect each other’s space: Yes you’re friends but sometimes people want to be alone and quiet. If your roommate needs alone time, give him/her alone time.

Commune living can be fun too

If living with a friend doesn’t work out, consider moving into a commune.  The nice thing about communes is that most of the time, cleaning and laundry is taken care of so these things won’t be a problem.  The other positive of a commune is the ‘lock up and go’ culture; you do your own thing on your own time. But remember, house rules still apply.

When it comes to moving in with friends, it is a great idea to save a little bit of money. Just be sure you know what you are getting yourself into before calling the movers. #thatisall